"A thousand times I failed, but still your mercy remains. Should I stumble again, still I'm caught in your grace. "

This is a line from a Hillsong song that I sang many times growing up, and it still resonates with me.

It's the fact that I'm still here, sharing with others the very nature and gifts He blessed me with. I remember a time not long ago when I poured myself into a different field—working tirelessly, hoping to find my purpose and sense of worth. But despite all my effort, things never fully clicked. It was humbling, and honestly, disappointing. Looking back now, I see that He hadn't called me to that space, yet He never withdrew His mercy or love. Instead, He patiently led me back, reminding me of my identity and purpose in Him.

The rollercoaster of emotions and unpleasant experiences, the accusations thrown around and judgments passed, conclusions drawn, and subsequent steps guided by these conclusions, are always the hallmark of this mental state.

Defying the very nature of the one who modeled us in his image and likeness, yet we are ever confident and feel a great sense of justification.

Wanna know the root cause? It's the lack of trust in the Father. Whichever way you spin this, you've got to realize it's always us trying to fit a peg in the wrong hole.

In Christ, we assume our identity, which the Father has created for us. It comes with its task, assignment, field location, and responsibilities, all of which we are equipped to handle. There we find peace, joy, and a quiet confidence that cannot be explained. For me, the rest of God feels like finally being able to breathe after holding my breath for so long—a sense of belonging and assurance that I am exactly where I am meant to be, even if the journey was messy. If you’re struggling with trust or feeling out of place, let this be an encouragement: God’s mercy truly does remain, and your identity is secure in Him, no matter how many times you stumble.